Action Hero 3

Location: Panjim, Goa, India.

I live there. I did feel fear, uncertainty, reluctance before the event. When I was not afraid, I was aware of consciously avoiding eye contact with Indian men. My neighbourhood is fairly well lit, but pretty deserted after 10. It's a safe space though and the groups of Indian male tourists looking at me over the only strange factor. At the end of my walk I felt

exhilaration, confident, tired (fighting your fear tires you more than walking around!)

I became aware of the non-eye contact and was a little surprised by that. Never knew I went so much of my way to not-connect with Indian men. I keep making that distinction because I don't have the same fear with foreign men. Maybe it is years of experiencing harassment and groping by our own people that have made me wary. My experiences abroad and with visitors here have only been positive, though. And it saddens me. I'm sure others have contrary experiences - after all not all men are the same, but this is mine.