Was shocked nobody did anything, so i ran up to the guy caught him from his collar and slap him so hard my hand hurt a lot for two days but i felt very good and happy since i fought back and i did'nt have to regard later.

I dont think i could have dealt it in anyother way, since even wen ppl have seen it they were less bothered n the first reaction would always be hit the person take out the anger and shock before it runs you down.

I felt very angry cos non of the ppl did anything, until i slap him. i felt humilated and it spoiled my evening.

i am 27 years of age. Delhi.

Posted 9th February 2008


In a private bus in kerala(calicutt) one man pressed my breasts. first i thought it is accidental, again he repeated it.

i removed my high heel sandal and slapped him blue and black

do you feel you could have dealt with it in any other way?

after 4 or 5 slaps he kneeled down in my feet and started to lick my shoes.i felt mercy .

what did you feel?
anger and insult

Time: 11 am

Posted 22nd March 2008


I was in an auto, coming back from college. you can say i was dressed smartly but definatly not screeming out for attention...on the red light, 2 young guys on bike were standing next to my hapnd so that i noticed the pavillion rider checking me out. i first ignored it, but then the guy getss off the bike and asks where i am going and comes very close to me as i was sitting at the corner of the auto!!

at first i dint respond and pushed myself towards the other side of the auto. but then he asked my auto guy where i was going. at that time i had lost all control. and i snapped at him by rudely saying , " bhaiya ji , aapne jahan jaana hai wahan ka rasta poochiye aur chalte baniye." this didnot affect him, he got more bold and said ," wahi toh jaana chahte hai, jahan aap jaa rahi hai wahin chale jayenge..." i gave him a bad stare and was about to take my cutter out ,but my auto guy managed to escape..and the guys were safe from being dead!!

What did you feel?
humiliated and scared at some point too.

Posted 22nd March 2008


It was a usual evening for me, only slightly different because it was a saturday and i was looking forward to my weekend. i was returning from my office where I am interning at about 5 in the evening. I got off the metro and walked towards the main road to hail an RTV. Not seeing one around, I started looking for a rickshaw. I saw a few at the next red light but not any around. so i started walking towards them. While I was walking, a bike passed by with two men wearing helmets. They slowed the bike, raised the glass of the helmet, gave me a sleazy look and drove away. Nothing new, i knew. Within a few minutes. the bike took a U turn and came back. This time the driver stopped and the one riding pillion tried to grab my breasts, but realizing what he was going to do, I created a barrier between myself and him with my hand. He tried to push away my hand and this time tried to grope my shoulder. i pushed again. The attacker was in no mood to stop but the one driving quickly drove away. I tried to get the number of the bike, but shock and trauma made it imposible for me to see completely.I could just make out DL WS 0356 or was it DL 03 WS 56... I was confused..People on the road just kept looking at me, and not if i had done something wrong. they were looking at me as if i was a tamasha...n kept turning to look at me..I glared back at was my way of saying that "fine, you could have helped me, but didnt..but its not like i cant help myself..i fought for my dignity..yes i did"
And then home was still far away and should i take these ricks which are being ridden by people who saw a spectacle being made of, i wont!!
I walked home..all the way..And i knew that if this hppens again, i will tackle it..i will note down the number and ill call the police...
but I reached home safe....not without doubts of.."what if the driver had not driven away? what if the two men had got down and done something to me? then what?
I went off to sleep that night telling myself that in any situation, ill tackle it.
Next evening, I got off the metro, walked towards the main road..there was a bike on the other side of the road and two guys screaming..."meri jaan..arrey meri jaan..bahut maal hai...." People on both sides of the road were loking at if again it was my fault...across the road i could not see the bike number..and they quickly drove away....
I felt helples and used...and scared of every guy on a bike..who can say anything and try to do anything to me and drive away a jiffy before i can even realize what has happened...
I get nightmares of nameles,, faceless men in helmets and on a bike...and i feel scared. Yet, I walk on the road with maybe not a concrete belief but atleast the convction and strength that i will fight, struggle and make an effort to help matter what..

time: 5 pm
location: west delhi. dwarka

Posted 3rd April 2008


My name is Janet from Mysore.
Once I had to go to my aunt's house in sakleshpur. The street there is a rather lonely street. A young guy was walking in the opposite direction. He came towards me and asked "Excuse me?"
I looked at him. Suddenly, he grabbed both of my breasts and squeezed them. I did not know what to do. The idea of hitting him did not enter my head.
He squeezed my breasts for some time and let go. Then I caught hold of his hands and said "squeeze my beasts again. This time, squeeze them properly. Put your hands inside my T-shirt and squeeze."
He stared at me in surprise. Then he said "Sorry" and walked away.
This technique worked in my case. I am not recommending this for every woman, but in my case, it worked. I could have slappedhim, but I hate hitting anybody.

Time: 3pm
Location: Sakleshwar

Posted 3rd April 2008


i was on a morning walk with my ipod and was on my way back home,when i noticed a man on a scooter around me. he was there for quite some time even when i took a diversion. i decided to walk back home faster and just a couple of houses away, he came alongside me and squeezed one of my breasts. i couldnt hear me coming because i had loud music playing in my ears but i should have probably been more careful. anyway, he sped up after that and i swore at him. he obviously didnt hear me. but after that, i felt horrible.

some weeks later, he followed me around again and this time, i stopped. turned. stared at him to let him know that i could recognise who he was even though he was wearing a helmet that day. looked at him the same way all the times he followed me after that. though not without fear. and with satisfaction, i realised he wasnt there after that! 

experienced: anger. humiliation. degraded. cheap. insulted. shame.hatred for him and his kind.

age- 16
time- 8 30 am
location: basaveswaranagar

Posted 7th April 2008

Blank Noise Action Hero Anon

I was traveling in crowded Bus. I was boarded the bus from the Back door and as the conductor's instruction I was slowly moving towards the frond of the bus where the ladies sit and stand........... and this is normal condition of any bus in peak hours of traffic. I have seen one women aged approx. 30 wearing her sari standing and holding her hand with a rod on top of the bus. One middle aged man approx. 40 standing near to her putting his hand in her hip purposely by taking advantage of the bus turning left and right while moving. The lady could not help and she was reflecting her inconvenience thru' her eyes and she saw me for helping out from the situation. It is very much visible that this man doing purposely and I immediately acted by not shouting at him but further moved towards the Bus Driver and informed him about the incident and requested to him to stop the bus. The Good mannered Driver immediately stopped the bus and helped me by sending this man out of the Bus. The man was stepped out of the bus with shouting heavily. Had I been shouted at him the whole purpose would have been wasted and he may take revenge not only with me but also with the lady. This is the way I acted.

Location: Bangalore
Time: 10 am
emotion: insult.

Posted 7th April 2008


It was on a busy evening almost 8-9 years back, and is just one among the many such incidents i have had to tackle. I had boarded the bus after my classes in University and was on way back home. The bus was too crowded, but I still managed to squeeze in as I was feeling a little too tired and clumsy that day -- perhpas the day wasn't that good or just overworked.

(In Kerala, buses generally have two different doors - the front one for women and the back one for men.- And also, the seating arrangement is somewhat like that where the front rows are reserved for women; the general seats come behind these). The bus was so crowded people did not even have place to stand. Men were jostling against each other everywhere. i could not even see a single woman except in the first row window seat. And because of that only, the man in the aisle seat near the door got up when he saw me (as the seat was resrved for women). I occupied that seat next to another man who was dozzing off in the window seat. To be frank, I was not very comfortable and was very very cautious when I sat there because of the crowd of men falling from every side on me and seat is particularly vulnerable because of the positioning. I was having a difficult time not to fall off because of the high speed of the bus and also the curved roads.. yet i was aware of each movement around me (as any girl in Kerala would be, while travelling in a bus). 10-15 minutes and then suddenly I felt a hand moving on my right thigh. I fidgetted, the hand came still, but sat firmly there only on my thigh. I could not see the hand there, because of the crowd around me. I managed to look around and up and tried to find out whose hand it could be. And when I realized it, the man was so cold, non-challant and started looking in another direction. As if he did not know what is happening. The hand remained there. I touched him, and called out to remove his hand. I said this in normal voice and not very loudly. Many such people, i have seen before had responded to this kind of direct, confrontations. But, he was standing there as if I was talking to someone else. I was embarassed a bit more now as other men around were looking at me. I knew very well they all know what might have happened -- if not exactly what has happened, but some sort of violation on my self -- but none asked anytying except looking back at me. I kept quite for a while undecidedly - may be a few seconds-- and his hand was moving again. This time my voice was louder so that eveyone else around could hear. And I stretched my hand up and patted him on his shoulder - he tuned back and stared at me. I looked back in his eyes and told firmly to take his hand off. a second or two passed - the hand remained still. My voice was raising, and it asked him to take it off again. And he did. I didnot see him again, as he receded and merged into the crowd behind.But, yes, it had worked; also the crowd around me moved a little here and there to give me more comfortable sitting space and the guys whose butts were just in front of me were now stretching and repositioning themselves so that even accidentally no one touched me.

Many such mortifying incidents happened over years --- the first one I could remember is at the age of 8-9 -- Yet this one is something where I talked back with so much of definiteness/ and confidence.. and I think it paid off.

TIME: 4 30 PM
current age: 31
age when expereinced it: 22
Place: Calicut
emotions: humiliation, insult, embarassment

Posted 9th April 2008


This man was staring at me and he came nearer and nearer when i was travelling in a bus,he even didnt give place to other ladies to come towards me.finally when it was my stop ihave to get down,the bus was not crowded,but he came against me.i said side please when i am going my way he slapped my back,when i looked back he kept smiling eating pan parak.

i was just 16 aged and i was disturbed the entire day thinking about why did that stupid enjoyed me.....

time: 7 30 am
location: Andhra Pradesh

Posted 18th April 2008


This problem is a global one -- my story is from Minneapolis in the USA.

I was riding the city buses to get home from my university. When I was most of the way home and most of the people had gotten off the bus, a man who had been asleep in the back of the bus woke up and began shouting in short disconnected bursts, like someone trying to shout through a cell phone with a bad connection. I glanced back, but thought he was talking on his phone. I had been studying, and began to put my notes away when I felt a heavy blow across the back of my head which felt as though it nearly snapped my neck. The man from the back of the bus had snuck forward and struck me.

I immediately got up and walked up the bus aisle shouting "Call the police! This man hit me! Call the police!" The driver pulled over and asked me to repeat what was happening, while two tall young men got up and blocked the aisle between the man who hit me and the rest of us on the bus. The man was shouting about how he had only wanted to talk to "the redhead" and was just trying to get my attention, and we realized he was drunk. (Among other things, my hair is brown, not red.) The driver summoned the police, and while we waited for them the two tall young men continued to guard the rest of us from the drunk man. It turned out the man had a number of arrest warrants out for domestic assault (hitting a member of one's household). He immediately went to jail.

I thought it was interesting what some us looked like and how it doesn't fit the more common prejudices of this country. The violent man was an ordinary-looking middle-aged white man, while the two young men who protected us all were young, black, and wore rap-music style clothing, and white women like me are told to be cautious of the latter but not of the former.

Time: 7 pm
experienced at the age of: 36

Posted 18th April 2008


I still remember it clearly. I was on my way to the local grocers to buy some oranges for my mother and a few steps away from our house. I noticed this big, burly looking guy walking towards me from the opposite direction. As he got closer, I noticed he has no intention of passing by me but he is walking directly towards me as if he'd like to bump into me. So i started walking slightly sideways to move out of his way and still he kept walking towards me trying to block my way. He got closer and managed to grab my left breast ( note: I was only 13 and had hardly developed!) I shouted abuse at him but he laughed and continued on his way. Another man who was walking ahead of me turned back and looked at me and turned around indifferently.

Later on, when I arrived home, I told my mother what had happened and how hurt I was. The response: " If anything like that happens again, just walk off without saying anything or reacting. What will people say?"

I was hurt, not by the pervert who took advantage, but by my mother who advised me to keep silent as a reaction to harassment.

Location: Iran
Year: 1994
Age at the time of experience: 13
Current age: 25

I felt humilation, suffocation, and insult

Posted 27th April 2008


A few weeks ago the Sunday evening was beautiful and at around 6:30 in the evening, in broad daylight, I decided to walk down to my friend's place, less than a km away from my flat. I put my really wasted jeans and a very un-flattering kurta for the sojourn and started. Barely 200mts away from his place, a guy half my height and a quarter my size, looked straight into my eyes and made smooching noises! And the next thing I know, I slapped him.


Time: 6 30 pm
Location: Hyderabad
Age: 23
I felt anger.

Posted 27th April 2008


This happened quite a few months back. i was walking as usual along with my friend in thane station heading towards my home when i was jolted by a sharp nick to my hand by a man who just passed by me. i felt extremely angry & was muttering out aloud ' why do these idiotic men do this?' ' what was the reason this guy touched me?', when he could have very easily passed by me without touching as it wasnt crowded at that time. i decided to walk upto him & hit him. i did not hit but tapped him on his shoulder & asked him loud enough so that everyone around could hear me. i demanded from him in hindi that why did he touch my hand, who does he think of himself & told him to walk carefully when he is around girls. his height was less than me & by the way i & my friend approached him, i think he got scared. but he gave a look of defiance, such that i was the one how had done something wrong. but this incident got attention of the other people on the foot-over-bridge & quite a few women glared at him. he was visibly embarrased, couldnt utter a word & walked off before i could finish speaking. this whole episode really left me fuming, but is one of the few instances when i reacted at being touched & it sure gives me inspiration to give back everytime such an instance occurs.

Location: mumbai.
age: not mentioned.

Posted 29th April 2008


This was on my way back home from tuitions,around 7:30 p.m.
I was returning home, finishing my classes at my tuitions which is located in a rather posh and busy area of Bangalore.
I was with a friend. And so was my perpetrator.
I and my friend were walking close to the road, since there were no footpaths.
Two guys were walking towards our direction. Since they were getting closer to us, I tried to move away to give them space or rather give myself space.
But one of the two guys evaded that space, and felt my thigh up with his index finger.
First I wanted to ignore this,but my anger got the better of me and particularly when I thought about the fact that I had tried my best to give myself space.
I turned around, the guys were already a block away..
I began to walk towards them. The friend of the guy who had tried to feel me up saw this and went- “uh oh..!”

Before I knew, I had given my perpetrator a nice hard punch on his back. But I was still trembling with both fear and anger.Nonetheless, I felt better doing what I did that evening than I would have felt if I had done nothing at all.

Time: 7 30 pm
Location: Dollars Colony, Bangalore.
Age: 17
Age at the time of experience: 17
emotion felt- anger

Posted 8th May 2008

Amrutha Bhushan

Me: Hello, how’ve you been?
B: I am fine. How re you?
Me: why don’t you come home sometime? You are done with all your exams right?!
B: Yeah sure. I will.
Me: you know Ive been talking to people about “eve-teasing” lately. And I’d like to know your story.
B: what story?
Me: About how you felt and what went on in your head when someone ‘eve-teased’ you. AND.. if you have ever tried to resist it or ‘give back’.
B: No. it doesn’t happen to me at all.
Me: really?
Me: you sure?
B: yes.
Me: you mean to say, you ‘ignore it’?
B: Before I used to ‘ignore’ it. But now it doesn’t happen to me at all.
Me: I see.

{B is a 17 year old student. Female.}
Story agent: Amrutha Bhushan


After a brief shopping spree alone,I head to Sankars to browse books cos I really dont feel like heading home.Its festival and Im not excited about it at atll.And too many people dropping into my place.I go the Indian Fiction section and my eyes spot Mark Tully.I remember Vikram telling me that he liked Tully.So I decide to try his book.The book is titled "No full stops in India".
I notice there is also a coffee shop adjoining the book store.I order my coffee and get back to my book.My seat directly faces the manager of the bookstore.I realise this only after I notice that he has been staring at me for quite sometime now.
I finish my coffee and decide on my book.
I go to the billing counter and the manager has to bill the book for me.
I give him the book.
I ask him,"Are you the manager here?"
"What is your name?"
I say"I did not like the way you were looking at me."
He is caught off guard.
I notice his ears turning red.
He fumbles for words.
He says "Sss-ss-staring? I wasnt Staring.I wasnt Staring!!"
"Ok.Fine if you werent."
"I'm shocked why would I be staring at you?"
"If you werent why are you being so defensive?"
He giggles..
"No!No! madam,you are not supposed to sit here AND read the book."
"Well,its a coffee shop.I bought coffee too.Then you must put up a notice."
"No,no,its just that you are not supposed to sit and read.thats why I was looking at you.ok?thats all."
"Then you could have simply told me that I wasnt supposed to sit here AND read."
He says the same thing again and again.("No madam!we do not allow people to sit and read!No madam! You are not supposed to sit here and read!")
I ask him, does he realise he is talking crap?15 p.m.


TIME: 5 15 PM
AGE: 20

Posted 8th May 2008


I am Noopur Raval. I have two instances where i was able to fight back. I still wonder why on the other occasions i was silent.

I was 8 years old. Right next to my house, another house was being built. A watchman had been hired for it. A friend of mine who was 11 used to come to my place to play. We both decided to go to the construction place to play since there was a lot of sand there. We were trying to climb on to a wall and jump from there. We had both worn frocks till knees. It was afternoon. The watchman returned and saw us playing. So we started to go for the fear that he might scold us. But he said it was okay for us to play. He also joined telling us that he wanted to play. We took it as a joke and returned to our play. Then he came and held my friend by her waist and slid his other hand to her thigh. She said she wanted to play alone but he wouldn't listen. So she was bearing up with "An uncle who was overfriendly and overhelpful". After "helping her climb the wall" he offered to help me. Out of sheer stubbornness and instinct i said no and ran to my house. I told my mom that there was a man who was holding us and pulling us and not letting us play. My mom understood what he was upto and ran along. By the time we came, my friend was sitting there crying and the man had vanished.She told us that he slapped her for letting me run home and he also ran away. We immediately called her mom and our neighbors and went looking for him. He was not the real watchman. We don't know where he went. All we remember is that evening and its horrible experience.

A year ago i used to study in Ahmedabad in Mount Carmel School. In the evening i used to go for French classes and return by a city bus. One day i got my results

of the french exam. I stood first and i was very happy. So i was generally smiling to myself and without much attention to who was around, i boarded a bus. It was around 6 in the evening and it was not dark as yet. i sat on a seat near the door. Suddenly after 5 minutes i realised that there was a man of around 20 who was staring at me. It is quite common to experience such thing so i didnt pay much attention but he gradually slid into a seat near mine. The bus being empty in the rear part, no one noticed him. I gave him real glaring looks and tried to show him i was getting annoyed. He had this sick long thumb nail and kept on flashing it. The picture is still fresh in my mind. I endured this drama for some 15 minutes and resolved to slap him before i got down. But he happened to get off at a stand before mine. I saw the opportunity going away and so i got up along with him. He was ahead of me in the line. I caught him by the collar. My heart was beating so fast as if caught somewhere in my throat. He turned and i slapped him. Then i don't know how but words came out of my mouth saying the usual stuff, " What on earth do you think i am? How can you treat me as an object like this? You think i am weak or something?" But to my horror he retorted by trying to hit me. That long nail of his brushed my neck and left a mark. Fortunately i wasn't hurt. Meanwhile, only one old gentleman stood up and pushed the guy away from me.He started yelling at him and supported me. But all others just sat there, some smiling, some muttering but no one really bothered. The conductor threw him off the bus literally. We carried on. That moment i was extremely happy and satisfied with myself but the moment i got off, i was haunted by the fear that if i met that chap again somewhere i wouldn't know how to deal with him the next day. This was probable because he had gotten off just one stand ahead of me. I changed my route for a few days. I never saw him again. 

Posted 15th May 2008


Bus from kerala to karnataka. I need to get to my seat. The man standing in front of me wont move and let me get to my seat. I say" excuse me? "/ " solpa side please?!"/
He gives me the blank look after which I direct my hands in a manner that indicates he must move a little away from me so that I can reach my seat. After all, the last thing I need to do is get my body brushed against a stranger's- especially when there is no dirth of space.
He succumbs but hisses a " zzzxsssk!" staring my anatomy into little pieces.
In less than 3 minutes I realize that he has the seat in front of me. The seats recline, the hands recline even further.
All between him and me is the needle.
also posted on the Blank Noise Blog in 2007.
age: 27
location: Kerala





Posted 20th May 2008


In the understanding that someone will hear-

It was a sixth standard horrid summer. I already felt like an outcast, what with not knowing Hindi in the linguistically biased area of North Delhi, and not accepting that I had to do certain things to stop men from leering. Walking the bust-stop to house stretch in the sticky summer was enough torment. Trying to avoid men's glares, jeers, and comments, made it a more torrential walk. Every school day, my sister and I would walk, try our pre-teen bests to ignore the ugly, and get home as soon as possible. Every school day was a fight to get home without the feeling of having walked into a pile of vomit and dirt blended into an intolerable concoction. One of those memorable afternoons, we were about two houses away from ours when a sardar on a pale blue scooter and under a bright pink turban chose to ride his scooter really close to us, go ahead about 5 meters, and then turn around to get another round of riding by us. This time however, he chose to whack my very flat chest gleefully as though he had given me the world's most exciting gift. In shock I let the rage rise. I then let my surprise take over and then the slow realization that I was just assaulted in the middle of the afternoon, wearing my “modest” school uniform, at age 11. I remember looking down at my own body and analyzing what I did to invite him. I remember feeling tired, dirty, and tirelessly consumed. I remember trying my damnest to forget. I remember walking down every school day after that day with a contorted face so I would look “ugly”, “unwanted”, and “undesirable”. Two weeks later, a cyclist unzipped himself and asked us to suck on his penis while we walked back home on the bust-stop to house stretch in the sticky dirty summer. I remember adding a limp to my contorted body to make it more undesirable. Is this resistance, I wonder? Given my resources at that age, I would say yes. Today I would resist differently. In a way that doesn't stunt my own self.

Today I can look back and tell some stories that include me glaring back, shouting, crying, admitted, screaming, and most importantly, confronting. Share yours.

Time: 3 pm
Location: Pitampura
Current age: 21
Age at the time of experience: 11

felt: Anger. Denial. Heat. Anger. Anger. Anger. Disillusionment. Regret. Anger. Anger. Anger.

Posted 26th May 2008


I am Ramya.
I Love my neighborhood. I have lived here for as long as I can remember.
I have never had to switch homes since the house is our own, and am I glad!
Last week, I went to the Ice cream parlor close by to get my cousins a tub of butterscotch.
On my way back, I noticed that the the tub had began to leave a trail of melted cream. It had dripped on to my feet and shins.
I remember, I had worn a Capri that day.
A man, who seemed to be a relative or friend of my neighbor was hanging out near their gate.
He ogled at my bare shins. It felt more sickening to have him look at me the way he did, than to have sticky ice cream greasing my skin.
I walked straight up to him and asked him if my neighbor was home. He mumbled that he didn’t know who I was asking for.
I pushed the gate open and rang the door bell, soon enough there was my neighbor, a middle aged woman.. who had just finished her business in the kitchen.
She looked tired and asked me to come in, and to help myself to the some warm halwa ..which she had just prepared. I informed her that I myself had guests at home and needed to get back soon.. I bid her goodbye.
The guy was still out in the compound, trying to play aloof. I went up to him and said that – there’s the woman I was looking for(pointing to my neighbour, who was now busy sweeping the balcony) and enquired him if he was sure that he is was not a stranger.

Time: 6 pm
Location: Jayanagar 5th Block
Age at the time of experience: 23
Current age: 23
felt anger and insult

Posted 26th May 2008